Tick tick tick

Posted: January 11, 2012 in Uncategorized
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The Guardian: “Doomsday Clock ticks one minute closer to midnight.”

The clock, maintained by the Bulletin of Atomic Scientists, has been gauging our proximity to global disaster since 1947, using the potent image of a clock counting down the minutes to destruction. Until Tuesday afternoon, the clock had been set at six minutes to midnight.

I’m sure this had nothing to do with everyone obsessing about 2012.

But a number of the scientists who took part in the deliberations said they were also dismayed by a growing trend to disregard science.

And then they put it forward in 2012? Well done, Bulletin of Atomic Scientists. Now that’s how you get media attention!

Porn bunker

Posted: January 9, 2012 in Uncategorized
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Imagine my surprise when I began to read the delightful New York Times interview with Stephen Colbert, tackling such things as his background and how the show’s writing process is “extravagantly wasteful.” Colbert likes to say, “Let’s make it perfect and then cut it.”

Then — do my eyes deceive?

Other promising bits abandoned recently were one about a porn bunker developed by some adult filmmakers in anticipation of the Mayan doomsday prophecy

Wait? What? There’s something like that?

I go to Google faster than a zombie shambles toward a post-apocalyptic straggler.

Uh, file this under “not surprising,” but the website is Not Safe For Work. However, should your curiosity get the better of you after hours, this quote made me giggle:

According to Pink Visual spokesman Quentin Boyer, the bunker is envisioned as “far more than a mere bomb shelter or subterranean survivalist enclave,” adding that the company “intends to ride out the 2012 apocalypse in style.”

Ride out. Hehehehe.

Our goal is nothing less than to survive the apocalypse to come in comfort and luxury, whether that catastrophe takes the form of fireballs flung Earthward by an all-seeing deity, extended torrential rainfall, Biblical rapture, an earthquake-driven mega-tsunami, radioactive flesh-eating zombies, or some combination of the above. We also intend to maintain our website update schedule throughout the ordeal, even if those websites are only available on the bunkers self-contained local network by that time.”

While Boyer conceded that building the bunker is “obviously a major undertaking” he said he remains confident that Pink Visual will complete all major construction by September, 2012, and that the bunker will be fully operational well before the end of the “Great Cycle” tracked by the Mayan Calendar Stone.

I mean, I couldn’t even make something like this up! Can’t you imagine the kind of wild solstice party they’re going to have in there? I mean, what are they going to call this place for short, a porker?

So, mark the date on the calendar. The apocalypse has officially zoomed by the mainstream to become ubiquitous when even porn stars worry about doomsday.

I don’t want to solely focus on doomsday theories or crazy people, although those are fun. I also want to point out some opportunities to learn.

I started a new job, where I work with a huge database full of travel information. Out of curiosity, I looked up my hometown park, Dade Battlefield Historic State Park (which is having its 32nd re-enactment today, only to see this in the calendar:

PREPARATION OF WILD EDIBLES WORKSHOP
Dade Battlefield Historic State Park

Date: Friday, January 20, 2012 from 6- 9 p.m.

Description:

Participants will learn how to prepare wild edibles that have been harvested locally from the woods including longleaf pine nuts, basket oak acorns, black walnuts and pignut hickory nuts. Food items will then be used for a future wild edibles class at the park.

Where: Dade Lodge, Dade Battlefield Historic State Park, 7200 CR 603, Bushnell, FL 33513

Materials needed: Nut picks (metal dental picks ideal), bring a potluck dish to share and your own place setting

Fees: $3 per car load up to 8 people or park pass

Contact: Call for reservations: 352-793-4781

Directions:

  • Dade Battlefield Historic State Park is located off I-75 and state Road 48, west of Highway 301.

I love wild edibles. It’s free food — about as organic as you can get — and most people either won’t know what to look for or let intimidation get the best of them. This is right up my alley…only I get off work in the Orlando area about 6 p.m. and won’t make it.

However, if you’re nearby, you should definitely try to make it. Books like “One Second After” point out that our industrial food system cannot feed the entire population should some disaster occur. (I think “One Second After” is terribly written, but the idea itself is good.)

After all, food security, even in China, is a problem. India has the Food Security Bill. Also not immune? The U.S., which is no surprise considering ethanol’s impact on food prices.

Gasoline makers will be legally obligated to use 50-billion liters of ethanol this year. That will use up more than a quarter of the U.S. corn supply, says Purdue’s Wally Tyner.

After all, corn is in everything and everyone, as the 2007 film “King Corn” so memorably pointed out:

http://www.hulu.com/embed/Q0PLL_NqXdq-sG9ru09SNg?shared_ad_id=76197

Is it bad that I’d consider subscribing to GBTV just to watch this show?

I miss “The Colony,” y’all. I can only watch “Doomsday Preppers” or “APOCALYPSE 2012” repeats for so long…

Reader rift

Posted: January 5, 2012 in Uncategorized
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What do Cuban Santerian priests think about 2012? (Wait, are we taking a global poll here?)

Doing a quick search on Google, you could come away with one of two conclusions:

A. Santeria priests: Doom in 2012!

B. Santeria priests: Year for cataclysms, but it’s not the end of the world

So you probably already know which one The Associated Press distributed – without even clicking on the links – but is it more fun? I know which one would probably draw more page views… After all, Armageddon is big business!

(And, no, I’m not making anything off this blog. Leading my husband to ask, “So why are you doing this?” He also wants me to amend what I wrote about being very skeptical.)

See, two people will read the same information two different ways. Form your own opinion. And, yes, I totally am skeptical. Mostly.

OK, so I really was going to move past the Maya and 2012 because there are other really interesting doomsday scenarios like extreme solar flares. (This is where some doomspeakers would pretend not to have read the part in the article that says, “There’s no reason to think this solar maximum will be worse than any seen before.”)

However, the interesting “Maya 2012” tidbits keep drawing me in…

Mayan 2012 Calendar: Doomsday December 21? Scientists Offer New Reassurances – ABC News.

Tulum, Mexico.

“He/she/it arrives.”

If you read the article I mentioned yesterday, you’ll remember there was a second glyph found in Mexico that mentions 2012 and something arriving or coming from the sky.

I find this interesting because the image I took of the Temple of the Frescoes, above, in Tulum, contains a stucco relief of what is known as the Descending God (or Diving God), who was associated with rain, lightning, the setting sun and planet Venus. Notice also the creepy hand prints (with some hands having six or seven fingers) done in red paint that are still visible.

Our tour guide, a Maya, explained that people asked him all the time whether this was “proof” that aliens visited. (He didn’t think too much of this.) However, that’s not the only theory out there.

  • A newsletter from The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (LDS) says these Latin American sites are proof that Jesus visited the Native Americans (using scripture from The Book of Mormon: 2 Nephi 25:20 as backup).

  • Another website proclaims “Evidence of Christ in Tulum!” While also mentioning the LDS tradition, it says two things prove Jesus’ influence: “the temple complex itself and the second is the symbol of the red hands.”
  • We’ll leave aside how many other religions have ascending and descending wordage and how it might sound to say the Maya couldn’t have possibly developed by themselves.

    I’ll just end with a real Maya explaining, in what no doubt is the first of many, many, many 2012 articles to come:

    “For them (2012)’s a joyous event, not an apocalyptic event. What is coming is the end of a calendar and the beginning of a new one.

    “It’s cyclical,” (Mayan expert Leonzo Barreno) told CBC. “This has happened before. According to the elders it’s the fifth time it’s happened.”